April 4
- scrambled eggs with soft cheese and black pepper. peas, cooked from frozen as briefly as possible. all with loads of butter.
March 31
doing an appetite inventory from the last couple years. I haven’t walked long distances at all lately, which seems to be a requirement to clarify a real appetite, so there hasn’t been anything specific I’ve been needing. the thought of almost all the items in this list triggers revulsion right now, unlike the thirst for them (and the deep satisfaction, after consumption) I experienced when they were current.
appetite seems to come in different formats. if there’s no ‘current food’, life can seem a little empty when I think about it, but only when I think about it. (it’s also strange to notice myself wanting nothing to eat or drink at all most of the time after spending a lifetime desiring everything all at once all the time.) maybe the things I’m taking in and digesting currently are not food, but.. idk, life? Loving my kid, loving my partner? that said, here are some things I remember requiring for days, weeks, months on end over the last few years.
- angus burger patties, plain, cooked to perfection aka with a solid, crackly, dark brown crust and nearly raw interior
- buffalo mozzarella with olive oil
- air-fried salmon, skin-on, plain
- surimi aka processed crab meat and corn starch
- liver ‘porridge’ with maple syrup
- liver ‘pancakes’ with maple syrup and blackberries
- cappelletti (‘angel hair’ pasta) with marcella hazan’s (but different) tomato sauce
- marcella hazan’s potato-celery soup
- basmati rice with butter and grilled tomatoes
- reverse-seared steak, plain, no salt
- eggs, scrambled with a bunch of parmesan, + a shit ton black pepper
- cilantro on everything
- tahini (or greek yogurt + tahini sauce) on everything
- sriracha on everything, especially scrambled eggs and
- jasmine rice, reheated (!!), with butter, greek yogurt, and sriracha
- sourdough pancakes
- raw milk
- homemade kefir (my grains have been going strong since summer 2023, damn)
- ‘käse krainer’ (interestingly textured wiener sausages WITH CHEESE. heated in water)
- quark with frozen raspberries, defrosted in a saucepan with maple syrup (quark is an unsalted dairy product. texture and fat content are somewhere between yogurt and cream cheese)
- angus burger patties, cooked as above, but with cream cheese, sriracha, and parsley
- grilled/baked heavily olive oiled eggplant (usually with buffalo mozzarella)
- cucumber and feta cheese salad. cucumbers quartered length-wise, then cut into 1-inch chunks. add salt and apple cider vinegar, then an equal amount of equally sized chunks of feta cheese. eat some cucumbers, then some feta, then some cucumbers with feta.
- prawns, poached, then glass noodles, cooked, plain (yes)
- prawns, poached, in miso broth and butter, with glass noodles
- glass noodles in ginger-y tahini (or peanut butter) sauce, with an equal amount of cilantro in volume
- egg white bread grilled cheese sandwiches (this produces the strangest stools, fun tmi)
- 8-10 fried egg yolks, cooked JUST SO (what’s left of the whites getting really crispy while the yolks stay mostly liquid) in ghee
- pure egg whites, fried to a dark brown crisp, with salt, pepper, and paprika
- lightly cooked bacon (crispy bacon is too salty) and eggs (scrambled in bacon fat)
March 5
- vanilla ice cream protein shakes with blueberries and olive oil
- the oil, i think, keeps me satiated for a pretty long time, keeps my skin from acting up/drying out (this seems to happen when I don’t eat enough fat) AND clarifies my appetite when I am hungry again eventually.
- I feel less snacky than I do when I am more reliant on carbs